Daily EpiDose

Right now, I just reached work, checked Friendster and read a few blogs… And they’re all just lovely, funny & endearing snippets of the things that happen to us and run through our minds.. Made me think though…

Lay Hoon’s blog made me think (as her writings always do), whether we are all strangers to ourselves and we lose sight of ourselves before others do…

Pam’s blog made me realise that no matter how far we go in life, simple pleasures and mere youth can be brought back in seconds, when shared with a dear old friend…

And added to all that, the reminiscing of old Chinese New Year celebrations, and all the ones I’ve been through, and all the ones that will happen, every year different (and maybe a bit colder), but reaching out to different people and spending it in slightly different ways.

I think we are strangers to ourselves, when we lose touch of that golden spark within.

I think we are strangers when the world outside comes in.

But deep down, we know ourselves, just that we don’t often try..

As long as we never fool ourselves, the real "ME" will shine.

I think that no matter how far we go, true friends will always love us, and I’m thankful for the bunch I have right now. We progress at our own paces, fast or slow, and life can change in mere moments. Even then, I’m so lucky to have these friends who remind me of who I was, who I am and what I believe in. These friends of mine gently hold me when the winds are wild, so as to not let me stray too far. And every time we meet, our priorities are a little bit different, our speech and actions slightly changed, but then it all comes rushing back.

The jalangness we all shared in high school.

The crazy stupid things we did…

The lamest funniest jokes we laughed at…

All our dreams, desires and ambitions intertwined like a rich carpet everytime our minds and hearts meet.. I miss and love all my friends who have in their own meaningful ways, enriched my life, whether good or bad. They have taught me that you can be wise without bad experiences, you can follow without at first trying to lead, you can laugh in the midst of pain and suffering, you can cry and emerge stronger than before.

Maybe it’s my current state of mind that allows me to be this frank & emotional. But yes, some things are to be said, before we can’t even talk to each other about the weather. I’m thankful again, for these amazing people who have guided me and walked with me through our giddy, teetering days..

I grew & I’m growing with you…

I may look and act like a bitch most of the time, but my true friends know me as a big softie inside… I’m glad you know me and love me and accept me… I’m proud that I have cried in front of you and with you…

This one’s for all of you….

Love, craziness & hugs always,

Yil/Jules

Okay… Ian Dias just read the previous entry, and he laughed..

Then he said,"Could you please update your blog and clarify that I heard mayo instead of tomato.
And DUH, the tomato is a Vegetable."

*LMAO!!!!!!*

p.s. for those who are still "confused", the Tomato is a fruit. Because it has seeds.

FORENOTE:

Due to the ever-rising number of silly quotes made by Ian Dias, who is a true follower and loves to quote wise words by Confusion (the famous philosopher, NOT to be confused with Confucius [pardon the pun]), I have decided to log a series of confusing ‘wise words’ entitled,
"Confusion Says"

As always, an introduction to that wise moment will be given, which sheds light upon the cause (and maybe sometimes, no cause at all) of the arising situation.

Today, Ian and I sat at his dining table, eating lovely, big, thick & juicy sandwiches. I finished my sandwich while he was chomping away on his mayo-filled one.

I then reached out for a tomato and ate it raw…

Thinking about the tomato, I decided to test him and just went ahead and asked the sandwich-stuffed face piggy next to me for fun…..

So I said, "Babe, is the tomato a fruit or a vegetable?"

I looked at him, waiting to see if he knew the answer.

Between mouthfuls he replied ever-so-sagely,

"MAYONNAISE."

The funniest thing happened to me yesterday…

Here’s my story…

Ian and I are working at the same place and oneday, we found out about the outside toilet where you can smoke, from 2 girls in our workplace. It’s their favourite place to go (considering the fact that Cyberjaya is out of the way from everywhere, therefore a not-often-used toilet does seem like a better choice to hang out) and plus the fact that the inside toilet, is rumored to be haunted. So yesterday, I went in, wanting to shit, and since the whole alley to the toilet was so friggin’ dark, I asked him to teman me. After awhile, he came in.

Since it was our smoke-break (10 mins max), we both decided to have a lil snogging session (and it ended up to more…) and just as we were about to clean up, I heard noises.

The 2 girls came in to the toilet!

Ian jumped up and squatted on the toilet bowl, while I stood, facing the door, on the pretense of sitting (so in case anyone looks, they can see my feet as if I were on the toilet bowl).

Minutes passed….

They started talking about the Liverpool vs. ManU game.

Predictions of the score came out (0-0) which ended up as 1-0 ManU winning.

Talking about life…

Talking about guys…

I couldn’t take it, holding the pipe and standing in such a way, was making me damn stressed! Ian couldn’t take the sound of the water trickling, coz it made him think "like my time was running out, like a clock going tick-tock-tick-tock-tick-tock".

We both decided to smoke.

Then we remembered…

NO LIGHTER.

So I pretended like I was adjusting my clothes, and I stood up, switched off the water. The girls outside suddenly went dead-silent.

Moment of tense expectation.

(Due to the fact that this building is pretty lonely and not many people work here at night, and also, almost all girls have experienced a certain spooky happening in the girls’ toilet. Hence, they might have thought that this toilet might be in the running to be The Haunted Toilet No.2 in Cyberjaya)

So I bent down, and saw that they were SITTING ON THE SINK area and they kinda had a sense of relief when they saw my face. I asked them for a lighter, and I lit 2 cigarettes. Returned the lighter and resumed my "position" on the bowl, telling them, "Excuse me guys, I gotta shit. *feeble laugh*"

Relieved that it wasn’t a pontianak, they continued their talk. Best of all, they were on their 40 minute break, while we were just on our 10 minute break!

After we finished our cigarettes… the girls lighted their cigarettes.

GAWDDDDDD…..

This was taking forever!

In a momentary insane condition, Ian wanted to rush out of the toilet, coz his legs were cramping up and he couldn’t stand up for fear that they see his head over the door.

So we waited…

And waited…

And I had this sudden uncontrollable urge to laugh wickedly, walk out and tell them that I was horny and just wanted a little nookie in the office toilet.

But… NO!!!!

What if I lose this job… GAwd…

So we waited… and waited….

And finally, their colleague called them, and they said they had to go.

Their "rushing off" took another 10 minutes…

Finally, the door slammed, and we heard their footsteps going farther and farther away…

Ian jumped down and peed.

I stood up and flushed.

He wore his pants back again… and we rushed out of the toilet.

Fresh air never felt SO FUCKING GOOD!!

We walked back to our cubicles, legs shaking NOT due to shagging, but due to our cramped conditions… and our friend, Jeremy asked us, why the hell we took so friggin’ long. "Long story, my friend."  *Feeble smile*

So yeah, checking the time, we were stuck in the toilet for about 40 minutes.

But, it was funny, huh??

*LMAO*

Updated…

Ian clarified the whole thing yesterday night, in 3 words….

"Joke gone bad."

Hence I replied, in 2…

"Not funny."

Supposedly I’m the one he wants to marry.

But he can’t even spell my name right.

It’s 5 fucking letters.

And he spells it like his ex girlfriend’s name instead.

I can fucking spell HIS fucking name.

He can fuck me upside down in bed, but when it comes to the small stuff that matters… he can’t even get it right!

Maybe he is better off with his ex girlfriend, Bianca Lee Yenn.

I’d just like her to know that, if she ever stumbles upon this site.

Bet he never got HER name wrong.

And all I get called, is a name for a PIG.

Babe.

Fucking babe.

Hah.

Told you life is always bittersweet, guys…

Pandai-pandai la you Ian, wanna mess with my blog, sendiri punya mistakes all spilling out.

hey..this ain’t ur regular Julia it’s me…aka the bapok or what ever i’m called..

well Julia ur normal writer of this blog has taken over my pc..whereas i’m left without a pc..hence i’m on her pc now..well basically we (Julia,Jeremy&me) started playing monopoly…in the 1st round of the game she bought everything leaving me & Jeremy with nothing…So each time we(me&Jeremy) do actually roll we end up paying her…It ain’t fair….

To tell y’all something i was sleeping at work…and you know i felt/heard this Chinese girl which was brought up in London or some bloody english joint…Cos my god if if u were here gawd it sounded so real…yeah so she woke me up…man trust me even the spidey power boy who never died in that bombing lucky S.O.B will be out beaten on the spot..fooo..

So yeah…she finally(Julia) said she wants to sell some of her land..reason being she found out that it was boring cos she owns everything….Gosh i’m not even rolling my dice anymore..she is doing it for me..

wait people listen she said its just a game but she’s the one who’s so eager to win our asses….well…back to me not rolling my dice..yeah Julia rolls my dice for me now…talk about having ur personal dice roller..LMAO…..

She now turns around to me and tells me i owe them money…Darn i have to mortage my stuff..see whats left of me…I’m broke..

But the best is yet to come…be patient with people of Li-Yin’s lost cult of fried oyster..the best is yet to come..will tell y’all the whole flop of this game..

now a lil about me..I don’t blog..I don’t blog i’m not a blogger but it feels nice at times writing on a blog so that anybody and ur close buds could actually read about you and the ups & downs in ur life..ok update frm the monopoly board Julia has made her mind up to sell…She and Jeremy in a biz meeting on how much she and he wants to pay..

ok another update deal gone bad…Sigh..looks like i’ll never get my pc back..yeah its fine i have a pc at home but it wont start on me…WTF man…i’m at work i hardly use it but it got screwed…will get to the bottom of that..

To the usual readers of YilLLLLLLLLLLL….I’m just writing any random that hits my mind and the regular updates from the monopoly show down at work at 2am in the morning…I’m hungry…ok i never did like Pg at one time i did wanna put c4’s around the island so that the island would sink…Stupidity it was back then..yeah but julia totally changed my whole mind towards Pg its a cool laidback island..yeah i never did understand how slow things were there..the pace of people..like in k.l its like a jungle bad air for u to breathe in..people always on the move jams etc…man can go on that…and when i was younger i always felt it was slow..but now i’m older i guess still a jackass in the heart but yeah Pg is really relaxing…

The whole thingy on Pg just now was b’cos i’m hungry and craving for PG food…that damn fried oysters hmmmm the tandoori at the side shop..they got a branch in Gurney..man things are sweet and nice there…

all the old buildings…having the old heritage..still running on lime stone..rather then the current new buildings full of cement..If u were to touch the old buildings..and ur hand gets white…remember its not the paint..its the lime stone that was used before..before cement came in…

Yeah they are still playing…monopoly….i just found out frm yi-lin that i owe the bank i’m going broke..well i guess i’m out…they are still playing..

i guess i’ll crash out on yil’s table…..will write more later if i do get up..

I’ll leave the rest for her to write…

JULIA just told me that she wants to buy the most expensive land on that monopoly board..i said yeah just buy…me food later….I was taken away frm my typewriter…now i’m back…i declared bankrupt…so now on my left side julia&jeremy are fighting their asses off for what ever i did manage to buy b4 Julia the evil land buyer took everything off the board..

well i guess i wont write anymore…going to do sumthing online will find that sumthing to do..well anyways like i said earlier on the best is yet to come..

ok y’all know why i’m not in the mood to play monopoly after all its my fav game..apart frm checkers..as in board games i guess…Its a freaking pc monopoly game…you don’t even get to roll the dice you don’t even get to feel ur money in ur hand even though its only paper money you don’t get to touch ur cards of the land u bought…Its freaking unreal…Yeah you see what this Job has done to her & my jeremy…they have gone banana wankers…Man thank the stars up there i’m still sane…..I have a mind and a really hungry tummy playing double bass drums…

yeah just took a look at them they are so into the game man y’all gotta have a look two grown people sitting in front of a computer playing a monopoly game…getting worked up when they land here & there..i know i sound like a old granma…but yeah if u guys don’t believe me go check it out urself…

www.jgames.com/middopoly/

you see even the game has a J in front of it…what does it stand for? juliagames…yeah Jeremy is cursing right now cos Julia got him so broke..he’s cursing in chinese…now julia is talking like a hokkien business woman…in hokkien..ooops now shes back to a very well spoken english person..

ok julia went to pang jui..(pee pee in english) if i did spell it wrongly..

well..I’m bored…guess i’ll just go chill on the world wide web..

while Julia & jeremy continue to buy each other off on monopoly

Ok i’m off…Julia is broke…..hell yeah i’ll let her have her place back..and i’m back 2 mine…awwwwwww…

Guess i’ll play a few games of pool or snooker with her 1st now…finally sumthing nice..

take care people..

Dear Bloggie,

I’m so super bored right now, that I’ve actually dug into that World-Wide-Shithole and discovered a few interesting sites…

Check them out if ever you’re bored…

• www.urban75.org/useless/bored.html
• www.bored.com
• www.atomfilms.com
• www.ebaumsworld.com
• www.funnyjunk.com
• freewebarcade.com
• www.jgames.com
• www.newgrounds.com
• www.screenmates.com
• www.I-Am-Bored.com
• www.freearcade.com
• www.theflashgames.com
• atworkandbored.com/index.php
• www.arcadetown.com

I think that was about it… And that should be enough for you guys for the time being… If you’re actually THIS free to have gone through everything by the time I put in my next entry….

YOU HAVE TOO MUCH FREE TIME ON YOUR HANDS, IT’S UNHEALTHY!

Go get a life, a job or something!

Or at least, play Sims.

Chao-de-maoz…

Every year I look forward to Chinese New Year… True, the old tradition of calling the Lion Dance Troupe to our house is no longer practised ever since my grandma passed away. Even then, knowing me & food… but unfortunately, this year, due to some personal problems, I can’t go back. So what to do? I’ll be working as usual… but I’ll be getting together with my relatives in KL. So for those of you out there who are coming back from Australia, America, UK, whichever part of the earth that you’ve deigned to return from,

COME SEE ME IN KL!!!

*BOOHOO..*

Obviously, this time my Angpaos will dwindle in amount, but that’s no longer a priority.. I just wanna get together with my friends and family….

Sadnesss……….

Well, time for a change.. if you notice, lately most of my activities have been concentrated in the Southern region of Malaysia rather than in the lovely Northern parts I adore.

Anyways, signed in to work and basically logged on here.. Too bored and nothing else to do. GAWD…

Dear Bloggie,

life can be so boring at times… surfing aimlessly on the Net for 9 hours straight can be frustrating. I’m surprised we still subscribe to Streamyx. I’m actually sick of the computer.

Anyways, been thinking a lot about life lately.. which i always do no matter what.

What are we supposed to do in life? I mean, there are so many ways to achieving success…

Feeling super lost and aimless… I guess maybe, I’m just not so prepared to put in the required effort to achieve what I want.  Or maybe I’ve just lost sight of what I really want to do.

Everyday, on the way to work, I just look at the road and wonder whether these roads are what I’m going to see for the rest of my life?

I love music, art (product, interior, fashion, graphics, body mod.), cooking… so many things.. I just don’t know what to do. If I do revert to music, I’ll have to go overseas.. so many things are holding me back here in Malaysia. And even then, I don’t think I’m good enough to pursue this as a career. Cooking? Art? All these are passing interests and I’m so afraid I’ll blow this all away in a mere instant.

Best of all, many people think I’m not a good student just because the areas of interest do not involve reading or studying. ALLEGEDLY.

I don’t know… so many things have been on my mind lately, and as usual I always end up even more confused and even more depressed about it. Yeah, tell it to the world.. Funnily, this blog is more of an online personal diary rather than a newsletter to the whole world. Or is it supposed to be that way??

I have a draft of my New Year’s events still pending… Will publish that soon.. that was absolutely unforgettable! Best of all, when everyone was cheering and celebrating.. I guess everyone feels a mix of happiness, curiousity and definitely a touch of sadness and bitterness as we review our life in the past year. Making resolutions not to repeat the same mistakes and seeing our ups and downs throughout the entire year.

I regret not spending more time with my mom & grandma.

I regret doing stupid things that I did.

I regret being the way I am today.

I regret all my flaws, character-wise and physically.

And today, something happened that made me realise certain things about myself..

I’m so different from Ian. His family spends a lot of time together, whereas my family is more of a solo-independent type. And, maybe, the fact of me being with him has made him drift away from his family. I don’t know what to do..

I want to move out so I can be independent.. but his dad was right. If I move out, he most probably will too.. and his parents want him to stay with them. Where can I go where I’ll be out of the way of someone else’s life. I realise now, that I tend to obscure (is that the right word) other people’s lives.

*sigh*

Maybe I should just disappear…. funnily, this time, I’m actually voicing what I’ve been feeling for the last few years… I just want to disappear and let the world go on without me… I don’t want to hurt anyone in the process, but a little part of me keeps telling me that I won’t be missed.

So where do I go from here?

Maybe I should just go overseas and work/study there.

Wish I could be an island.

I wish that, I wasn’t such a screw-up. Guess the people I despised for saying that were right all along…

*sigh* (again)

Maybe I will.. I dream of a far-off space where I could be alone.. so I won’t hinder anyone.. Alone with my books, my music, my art and my lovely vices, Nicotine, Alcohol and Weed.

HEhehe…

Conclusion of the week is:

It’s so much easier to walk a lonely path. Loneliness is bitter and may be very hard to swallow… but, when you realise the love you have for that one special person you’ve found.. your soulmate… when you realise that your love for that person is causing more strife than joy…

That’s makes Loneliness your sugar-coated painkiller.