My My My…
Tuesday, May 23rd, 2006I’ve been feeling so lost lately… Everyone I see are all GUYS.
I don’t even know what it’s like to sit down and have a cuppa with my dearest nearest friends and bitch about girl-stuff.
It’s all male ego, testosterone, which girl has the hottest ass, boobs, face, hair, whatever…
It’s all "Check out that CHICK… take a look at that AAAASsss… and DAYMN… PHEW-weett!"
And I smile and joke and laugh.. but what about checking out guys for once?? and talking about that shop with the funky accessories and laughing over stupid bloopers and comparing each others’ fat tummies and moaning about thunder thighs over espressos and skinny lattes.
Worst of all… the talk about Cars (which engine, turbo timers, body kits, axels, rearwheel drive, sport absorbers, intercoolers or 3 1/2 inch exhaust pipe makes the best meanest pimped up ride), Computers (including games like DOTA, command& conquer and whatever not), Hot Chicks (on Friendster, MySpace, Multiply, Tagworld blahblahblah how beautiful her tits look, check out her pic of her in just a thong, and those wonderfully mile-long legs with the sexy ankle tattoos) , Football (arguing over which team will win, why they won’t, who will take over and who will be traded, sold, bought over) and even Futsal (which arena is the best with artificial turf, cement, rubber whatever and what shoes to go with the floorings, and who did what magical goal that day) and Clubbing (where’s the cheapest booze, the best bhangra music, the place easiest to get girls, the place which is a batang-fest wherein there are no girls at all, the latest sean paul video, the hot places where there are mat salleh girls and prostitutes, bapuks, and too many horny guys….)
This I hear over and over and over and everyday…
Best part of it all is, when you think you’ve found the most attentive, caring and understanding partner of them all… you get side-pushed for All Of The Above.
*sigh* Noone’s perfect, yes I know.. but this brings back to mind a scene from a movie where a naked girl wiggles her ass in a skimpy thong in front of her boyfriend who’s watching the game on TV. He pushes her away, irritated and doesn’t even notice her.
Same scenario every woman would face, I think.
Top Ten Things In A Guy’s Life
(besides Free Wild Sex with 3 or more girls, which I will explain later)
1. Anything with a Screen
2. Anything that emits Loud Sounds (some girls included)
3. Anything with an Engine and preferably 4 wheels or more (combined with Criteria 2)
4. Anything with firm/hard/perky with Lines in the Middle (cars with sporty stripes.. girls with T-strings.. get the pic?)
5. Sports with sweaty men involving mostly balls (Both kinds..) which is also reminiscent of No.6
6. Shooting things into holes aka Goals, Girls, Baskets, Pockets (Golf seems pretty derogatory to me.. Hole in One, Birdy etc.)
All these observations at work..
But then again, I could be wrong..
Show me a guy who doesn’t at least like a few of those things above..
And I’ll show you a Bapuk on Jalan Haji Taib who still likes Anal Sex.
